Truth without Relationship

I heard Josh McDowell speak at Regent yesterday and his message struck a chord with me. http://tinyurl.com/clbczk The message was simple and straightforward...relationships matter. More specifically, a father's love of his children can transform their lives in astonishing ways. The corollary of course is true- the absence of love in a relationship can result in rebellion. Josh has long been known for this message, often stating "Rules without relationship leads to rebellion." He restates it helpfully, "Truth without relationship leads to rejection."

This relates to teaching kids responsible sexual behavior http://joshmcdowellmedia.org/FreeBooks/HowtoHelpYourChildSayNo.pdf

but I thought of it in connection with the academic endeavor. Where else do young people get such a massive injection of truth? The Christian academic context can often turn an anxious eye to the encroaching world, and in response, "dump the truck" of truth. Parents and teachers or youth leaders and college ministries can erect massive barriers of doctrine and approved behaviors only to find their students slipping under the fence to "greener grass" of wordly behavior. Is the answer better curriculum? Josh suggested that fundamentally, relationships underlie all of our behaviors, values and beliefs. If we want to see true life change in our students, we must risk personal involvement. We must love.

To be sure, today's litigious society makes personal involvement with students problematic. Appropriate boundaries should be observed. For instance, every teacher knows to observe proper physical boundaries (good touch, bad touch) but what about in cyberspace? Can or should a campus minister connect with students on Facebook or Twitter? If so, how much? Can these natural arenas of student connection be used for Christian love and encouragement? I think so--but what are appropriate limits?

To explore the thought further, I recall those teachers and pastors who made the most impact on my life were the ones who went beyond the classroom and made room for me in their lives. I think of lunches and hikes and simple family time that were the true classrooms where I studied. How does a husband respond to his wife? What does appropriate discipline look like? How does one say "no" without hurting feelings? All these lessons went beyond the classroom to personal discipleship and mentoring. I feel that I owe a huge debt to men like Bill Warrick, Dick Woodward, David Holmes, Harold "OJ" Brown, J. Rodman Williams, Joseph Umidi. They invested in me far more than truth--they dared to love me even in my immaturity and brash bravado.

So for what it's worth, I'm trying to give back. To share truth in relationship. What about you? Who invested in you? And then in turn, who are you sharing your life with that they might grow to be all God created them to be? That's what Josh was talking about, and I pray it resonates with us all.

Do the Most Good...

Some circles that I hang out in are all abuzz about organizations being more "Missional." By that they mean their church or parachurch organization should be more focused on accomplishing the Great Commandment and the Great Commission in the world around them. It's a natural response to the often self-focused, inward community that the church in North America has become. Only by turning themselves outward in hospitality and engagement with the culture around them can the church hope to regain some of it's lost luster.

I had opportunity to spend time this week with some fantastic individuals who belong to a missional organization. But it's no "johnny-come-lately" upstart. It's been around since 1865. The group is familiar to many...known as the Salvation Army. The SA's website explains their genesis:

William Booth embarked upon his ministerial career in 1852, desiring to win the lost multitudes of England to Christ. He walked the streets of London to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ to the poor, the homeless, the hungry, and the destitute.

Booth abandoned the conventional concept of a church and a pulpit, instead taking his message to the people. His fervor led to disagreement with church leaders in London, who preferred traditional methods. As a result, he withdrew from the church and traveled throughout England, conducting evangelistic meetings. His wife, Catherine, could accurately be called a cofounder of The Salvation Army.

Since 1865 this group has organized itself around mission, now emodied in the US by their slogan "Doing the Most Good." Their social mission is familar to many, as first responders to disasters and providers of direct service to many of the world's poor and needy. What may be less well-known, however, is that each Salvation Army outpost functions as a local church, pastored by the local Salvation Army Officer. This local church forms the heartbeat of a vibrant network of outreach and compassionate care. In short, the Salvation Army has been a missional church for over 140 years!

After spending several days with these humble servants, I came away impressed by their dedication, their passion, and their surrender to God's will in using them as soldiers in His army. Their work around the world has impressed many, including well-known management guru Peter Drucker.

As reported in Robert Lenzner and Ashlea Ebeling, "Peter Drucker's Picks," Forbes, Aug. 11, 1997, Drucker said:Drucker calls the Salvation Army "by far the most effective organization in the U.S. No one even comes close to it in respect to clarity of mission, ability to innovate, measurable results, dedication and putting money to maximum use." Those are his principal criteria: clarity of mission, innovative ability, clear definition of results and willingness to measure performance.

Despite this amazing track record, I found Salvation Army officers discouraged (of course not universely) over the state of their "Corp" (the church portion of their work). They often found themselves out of time to properly care for their flock, and felt unprepared to do so. The churches' size seemed to average around 50, though of course some where larger. It reminded me that "missional" is not the Holy Grail...even Christendom's greatest missional organization has challenges.

So as we seek to obey the Great Commandment and the Great Commission, we might remember that leading a growing, thriving community of the King is never easy. Balance is elusive, and there are no perfect answers. Jumping on the missional bandwagon can be merely a fad...or it can be an energizing life goal for the next 140 years. For the meantime, I am grateful to have met the amazing men and women who wear the Salvation Army uniform. May their tribe increase! In their honor today, do the most good, for the sake of our commanding officer.

Are You Ready to Fail?

Are you ready to fail?

Not exactly the start of a good self-help maual. Not precisely in line with the church teaching of "no negative confession." But from my experience, a pressing, prescient question that we all might ask.

Who is your favorite failure in the Bible? I'd have to say, of the many attractive options, mine is Peter. Here's a guy who's so bold that he walks on water. He asks to dive head first and immerse his whole body in Jesus' baptism of cleansing. This is a fellow who chops off ears in the name of Jesus--talk about making a bold statement! Peter was a tough talking, fast acting sailor in the Lord's Navy. But Jesus tells him point blank he's going to fail.

Luke 22: 31"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. 32But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers." Imagine that, the Lord Jesus looking you full in the face and telling you, "You're going to blow it today bud." How would you feel? I might blush, stammer, beg for forgiveness before I even half know what I'm going to do.

But not Peter. 33But he (Peter) replied, "Lord, I am ready..."Peter was ready not to fail. He looked at his heart, his spirit, his courage, and even in the face of Jesus' warning of impending failure, he was ready NOT to fail. Such overconfident ignorance proved his undoing.Of course he did fail. (Imagine that, Jesus was right) And he wept bitterly when he recognized what he had done.

But I think we can learn just a couple things about failure from this:

1. Jesus knows even in our good times that we're going to fail him.

We don't impress him or persuade him by our righteousness to love us more. He is imminently aware of our failings, but loves us anyway.

2. Jesus prays for us in light of our future failings.

He is our great High Priest...He knows our weaknesses, and is sympathetic in every one of them. There's no need to hide our weaknesses from Jesus!

3. Jesus in His providence can redeem our failures.

Not that He wants us to fail, but Jesus already is planning to use Peter's struggles to help him strengthen his brothers.

So are you ready to fail? I don't mean planning on it, or making the mistake of the libertine who increases sin that grace may abound (Rom. 6) Rather, are you as pragmatic as Jesus, knowing that your frame is but dust, praying to Jesus that he would help turn you around before during and after any failure? Do you hide your weakness from JEsus thinking he will be more impressed with your goodness? Do you dare think that even your greatest blunders could prevent God from working in and through you, to strengthen others? Then you may be ready NOT to fail.

I ask again, are you ready to fail?

Party of One--Being a Christian Single

I remember clearly the tone the waitress used when she took in my solitary self at the hostess stand at Ruby Tuesday's. "Party of One?" So dismissive. So accusatory. As if I was somehow less because I hadn't managed to attract any others onto this dinner date. At least to me it seemed that way. (Not that I was sensitive or anything!)

I was a Christian single, living in a "family values" world. A community of smiling, happy family units, sitting neatly in their pews, while Mom shushed the kids and handed them gum to keep them quiet. I didn't fit beside MY mom anymore, felt too grown up for that. But I didn't have my own family to value either. I was stuck in that awkward, in-between stage. Not quite a pimply, overly-hairy adolescent; but neither was I a real adult either.

Yesterday, I listened to my colleague Dr. Antipas Harris speak on the subject of Christian singleness. He made a powerful case that Christian singles should have their focus on the Lord "until then." That is, until the time when "the one" arrives (always thought that moment would be accompanied by angels singing and harps playing, it had been built up so much in my mind) a Christian single should be "focused on the things of the Lord." I Cor. 7:32 It sparked my memories of those single days when I thought St. Paul hopelessly pious and out of touch with my reality.

The feelings of isolation from that "awkward, in between stage" came flooding back to me. I was consumed with the frog's fear that no beautiful young woman would transform me with a kiss into her Prince Charming. Every wedding invitation that arrived in the mail was another subpoena to "solitary confinement." I'm smiling now, after fifteen years of marriage to a wonderful Princess, to remember my all-consuming fears.

I smile, not because those fears and insecurities were not real. Rather, because marriage brings its own troubles and challenges. Even the best marriage demonstrates the truth of Paul's words "a married man is concerned about—how he can please his wife..." (I Cor. 7:33) The overriding message Paul is giving in this chapter of the Bible can be found earlier...

"17Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him

and to which God has called him."

We each find ourselves in a "place in life" or a segment of our journey, that has challenges, problems and difficulties. When I was a "party of one" I got certain uncomfortable stares in restaurants. But now that I am a "Party of Five" the looks I get are Death Stares when my toddler destroys a booth in record time. We all need the grace of God to deal with the place in life the Lord has assigned to us. "Marriage is no land of perfection," I would tell me frightened, single self. Don't worry about tomorrow, because today has enough worries of it's own.

And in this place in life which the Lord has assigned to me, I too wait "until then" when "The One" will come. (for whom the angels will sing the hallelujah chorus!) For as Paul reminds us, "the time is short" and our bridegroom will come for us soon. Until then, we will love with single-minded devotion, remember to care for each other in whatever stage of our journey we find ourselves, and remember, the grass is rarely greener on the other side of the fence...

Peace!

Why I am in a Group called "Young, Gifted and Black"

I am the Director of Campus Ministry at Regent University. As any member of the academic community can attest, each year brings various celebrations of diversity to our campus. One is tempted to take the professional approach to each of these "days" or "months;" which is to try to give each one the same attention and honor, like distributing M&M's to a large family of kids!

I have to believe, however, that there should be more to this. I have found myself this year placed on the Hispanic Heritage Celebration team, and now the Black Heritage Month Committee. Those are impressive sounding names--great resume stuffers for the cynical post-modern academic. But I got involved in those groups out of genuine interest. so I ask myself, why am I interested? Why are these events more than an academic exercise for me?

Because the twin truths that I see in my heart are, that I AM interested. And I am white. Painfully, stereotypically caucasian. There I've said it. Just like the person who posted on my Facebook page said when the "News item" stated that I had joined the Campus Black Heritage Celebration group, "Young, Gifted and Black." "Psst, Richard, you're not black." In fact, in those categories, I am "0 for 3" So what gives?

It all goes back to MY heritage. I grew up in the American South, and as such was the product of racial stereotypes and attitudes of which I am not proud. But the truth was, I didn't even KNOW that I had these attitudes, until I made friends--mostly in college--who happened to be different races. Only when I began to talk about my experiences did the "water" around this fish suddenly become clear. I had grown up assuming that I could not trust others of another race, that I shouldn't live near them, that I could know certain things about "them" (as in, "hey did you see that one of THEM moved in our neighborhood") without even bothering to have personal experience with actual individuals. That was the most painful thing for me as my prejudices became more obvious...I had an opinion about people I had never met.

So one of my favorite Facebook stories just happened recently. I got back in touch with a childhood friend of mine, named Barrett, who is of a different race than I. I have never forgotten Barrett though we weren't especially close, because in 5th grade we ran the three-legged race on Field Day. We practiced and practiced over the weeks, learning to match speeds, shift our weight together, take every step in the race not as individuals but as one person. I have never forgotten that day, but assumed a REAL athlete like Barrett wouldn't even have a glimmer of my slim moment of athletic triumph. (We won) But to my surprise, Barrett posted on my page "Bet you don't remember the Three-legged race." He had been telling the same story for years.

I think this story is meaningful to me, not just because I am slow and white and rarely have won athletic events, but also because in my young world it was the first time I was close up with a person of another race...learning his mannerisms, understanding his strengths, coping for his weaknesses (although that was mostly me!) As I entered college, I took this image and tried to "bind" myself in friendship to others of different backgrounds, because I came to see my own shortcomings so much more clearly as we ran together.

So the reason I am in a group called "Young Gifted and Black" even though I am painfully white, old, and not so gifted, is that I need to bind myself to others in my community and run with them. Match speeds with them. See life from their vantage point. Because what I learned with Barrett is that we are in the SAME race after all.

I had the amazing fortune of speaking personally some years ago with James Meredith--the trail blazing Civil Rights pioneer who first integrated the University of Mississippi in 1962. He looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes and asked me, "Would you like to know the secret of race relations in America?" Well, I'm not about to turn that down, so I say, "Sure." And he pulls two pictures out of a tattered manilla folder. One was of a white woman, the other of a black man. "I'm related to both of these people," he said with a sardonic grin. And then said nothing. I pushed a little..." so what are you saying?" Finally, he gave the poor clueless white kid a break. "We're all really the same race here in America. The same race. But we won't quit fighting each other long enough to realize it."

So that's why I am young, gifted and black...we're all in the same race.